Sam’s* overprotective nature led to the end of his marriage and a disconnected relationship with his three children.
Despite being separated from his wife and living apart, Sam thought it would best for the family to all be under one roof during the pandemic. However, his son Jack* refused to talk to him entirely, and the rest of the family had made it clear that they did not want him around.
Family Works senior counsellor, Carolyn, worked with Sam on ways to help manage overprotective tendencies to ease pressure on himself and his whānau.
“He needed some support and direction; he came from a very abusive and neglectful family and had gone from that to the complete opposite with his children,” she said.
The whole family decided they wanted to do counselling and Carolyn agreed to work with them all individually.
After working with the whānau separately for a while, Jack, who had an impaired relationship with his dad, agreed to do a session with him.
At first, after the initial session, Sam was going back to his old ways which further impacted his relationship with Jack. However, it wasn’t until when Carolyn noticed Sam’s realisation of his actions that things started improving. Sam said, “I want to do anything I can for us to get our relationship back properly.”
Jack wanted to improve his relationship with his father too, and this led to a great conversation between the two. Although Jack was still not ready for face-to-face contact, he started to text with his dad more often. After a few weeks, they met up for a coffee and started to be in each other’s lives again.
On top of that, big family events were arranged. Jack is now married, and Sam was invited to the wedding.
Carolyn says the whole family has grown and are doing things as a family unit now.
“It is just a happy story, and they have all been so thankful, she says.”
“It is nice to see the whole family blossoming.”
*Names and some details have been changed to protect the identity of the clients.
